I have had an experience while here that I feel God is compelling me to share with all of you. But first I must share some background information for those of you who do not know. Since before I could remember I have suffered from Asthma and it was extremely bad as a young child. Growing up my asthma had been getting better and better and I had actually not been on medication for it for 5 to 6 years and had been using a over-the-counter inhaler for the past three years. Well that has since changed.
Since arriving I have struggled with being able to breathe and yet not feeling the need to seek out medical attention despite consistent use of my inhaler. Last Thursday night I went to bed with the realization that I had gone through an entire inhaler in less than two weeks (normal it took me three months to go through one) and I was completely out for the night. Unable to sleep, due to lack of oxygen, I began to pray with Joseph around 1 am and we continued to do so for about an hour and an half. Until Joseph decided that I was in need of emergency medical care and went to wake up his classmate who owns a car. Thankful this classmate's wife is a friend of mine and is a nurse practitioner by profession and was unalarmed by our intrusion in the middle of the night.
After spending 2 hours in the hospital I was released and went home and slept. It had been a very long time since I had to be on medication and it was even longer since I had to spend any time in the hospital. I came home broken in my spirit and confused as to why this happened. I knew that God had purpose and reasoning but I was unsure as to why at that moment. On Friday I had an experience that answered all of my questions and that is the most important thing for me to share with you.
I went to a seminar in the afternoon and although the topic of the seminar is irrelevant the thing God did through the person leading the seminar is not. During the seminar, the speaker felt the need to stop and pray for a person in the audience who was struggling with an issue in their life that they felt was holding them back from doing all that they wanted to do and he began to pray for that person. During this prayer I was completely unaware of the lasting effects of this prayer, thinking the whole time that the prayer was for someone else, such as the person next to me who began to cry during it. So at the end of the seminar I left without much more thought and was chased out by the man who had lead the seminar. He quickly informed me that he had to stop me from leaving because I was the person he was praying for during the seminar. I am sure most of you already figured that out but I was oblivious to that fact and as this man began to share what God had put on his heart for me, I began to cry realizing the awesome love of my God. Towards the end of our conversation he prayed for me and shared that he felt the God was truly desiring to heal me but it was more than a healing like it was never there but that it was to be a healing that was much deeper and complete.
I was overwhelmed by this encounter and not fully understanding it all but God was faithful to show me all that he had in story for this experience. I now understand that God allowed me to have this asthma attack that put me in the hospital in order to expose what was truly in my heart and that was shame. I realized that through out my life I had hid in shame over asthma and tried not to have to deal with it. I saw that God has the desire to heal me completely of asthma but first he needed to heal me of my shame and that is why this post is the first step. Shame is a lie and in order to fight a lie you must expose it to the truth. I realize now that for most of my life I have believed that some how I was inferior to everyone because I was unable to physically compete with them. I felt that some how I was defective and that asthma held me back from all that God was calling me to do especially in reference to missions. But God has truly redeemed my life for His glory and I believe in His promises and that God will completely heal me inside and out.
It would be awesome to have you stand with me against this lie and for my healing process to be complete. It would also be awesome if you would stand with us in prayer on the matters of finances as well. We do have insurance but have not heard back from them as to whether or not they will pay the entire hospital bill or not. Also the medicine is really expensive and we really have to trust that God will provide to pay for it. I am honored to be able to share this with you and I trust that you will stand with me in prayer. Thank you for all of your support in our lives up to now and for the future as well.
A few weeks ago the Old Testament class finally got some time to have some fun. The leader of the school, Robert Evan, invited us over to his house to help celebrate his birthday but I think that we were more spoiled more than he was! His wife, Bev, cooked us steak for dinner and we even had a Pinata!
Starting on the left is Bev, Makanna, Robert, Timothy, Ansuka. On the right is Jo, Terri, myself and Joseph. Jose is taking the picture but he is also in the class.
